I have been suicidal since I was fifteen. I still think about killing myself, but I work very hard to find other methods of dealing with my feelings and problems in life.
I used to cut, but I don't anymore, because I realize that it is not a constructive way of dealing with my problems, and it only compounds my negativity. When I have thoughts of a depressed, pessimistic nature, or about cutting, I try to do something positive to deal with whatever is on my mind. It takes an active effort.
For me, suicide is different. I don't think of killing myself only as a way of dealing with (or not dealing with--that is, escaping) my issues. Instead, I have suicidal thoughts when I feel that my chances of achieving long-term success and happiness are so diminished that the attempt is not worth it.
I do not believe in a god. There is no one to stop me, no one to punish me.
Atlas Shrugged is my favorite novel, and I most identified with the character of Cheryl. This character killed herself when the injustice of the world around her became too much for her to deal with. I feel the injustice all around me. I believe in morality, and the fog of gray morality surrounding me is suffocating. Ayn Rand, the author of Atlas Shrugged, expressed views regarding moral and immoral methods of killing oneself.
I do not believe it is wrong to kill myself. However, I believe in myself, in the value of my happiness, in the ability and goodness I possess, and I want to give this life all I've got before I concede defeat.
I was reading a
deviation and was struck by a few statistics that reminded me of the injustice I feel and the fact that our ways of coping are limited and often seem hopeless.
GLBT (gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender) youth make up over 30% of suicides each year.
Every 5 hours and 48 minutes, a GLBT youth commits successful suicide.
Every 14 minutes, a GLBT youth attempts suicide.Being gay is not a person's whole identity. Some of these people have other issues, like me, but the burden of being 'a sexual deviant' is heavy. I know what I believe, what I feel, and what I must do, for as long as I can. However, I'm sure that some of these deaths are not necessary. These deaths are not of homosexuals alone; they are the deaths of human beings. Some were good, I'm sure. Some were able. Some should have made it.
Check out the stunning photographs of *
discurrere!
JSYK
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Seas have their source, and so have shallow springs;
And love is love, in beggars and in kings.
-Sir John Dowland
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Hey, dog entity! Rise up and bare your biscuit filthy fangs at the oppressive leash wielding demon!! G**damn my navel itches!!
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I don't care at this point. I'm tired of being judged. I'm tired of having to care what other people think of me because they hold the goddam key to my freedom in their ignorant little hands!
dA is for the literary arts, too.
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I don't care at this point. I'm tired of being judged. I'm tired of having to care what other people think of me because they hold the goddam key to my freedom in their ignorant little hands!
dA is for the literary arts, too.
i got bored
how are you lol
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never am i going as sailor mars again!
getting out of the house and being asked if i am a hooker and how much i charge... isn't what sailor scouts deserve!
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I don't care at this point. I'm tired of being judged. I'm tired of having to care what other people think of me because they hold the goddam key to my freedom in their ignorant little hands!
dA is for the literary arts, too.
i hate having a flu.
watcha been up to?
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never am i going as sailor mars again!
getting out of the house and being asked if i am a hooker and how much i charge... isn't what sailor scouts deserve!
--
I don't care at this point. I'm tired of being judged. I'm tired of having to care what other people think of me because they hold the goddam key to my freedom in their ignorant little hands!
dA is for the literary arts, too.
--
never am i going as sailor mars again!
getting out of the house and being asked if i am a hooker and how much i charge... isn't what sailor scouts deserve!
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